this is my blog, where i write about things you don't and shouldn't care about
Every July since I was about seven years old, I’ve packed up my things and gone off to my favorite place in the world: summer camp! “My” camp is a Girl Scout camp in northern Georgia. It’s your stereotypical summer camp. Think friendship bracelets, bunk beds, archery, ancient burial grounds… Alright, maybe not that last one. But if you’ve seen it in a cheesy 90s camp movie, we probably have it.
When I was a tiny camper, I absolutely idolized my counselors. How could I not? They were like superheroes who could do no wrong (except for when it was time for Lights Out.) I wanted to be just like them, so I started helping out around the camp. Over time, I became recognized as something of a “CITIT,” or “Counselor in Training in Training.” New kids started mistaking me for a staff member because of my helpful attitude. This was fine by me!
As I got older, I started to get accepted as the counselors more and more as “one of them.” With this came seeing the other sides of the counselors, not just the ones that they showed us campers. I got a glimpse into the drama, dating, homesickness, and all the other fun stuff that comes with having your staff made almost entire of teenage girls. This was a bit of a shock to me. I had looked up to these people for so long, so seeing the other sides of them was a little weird, to say the least. Not to mention that being accepted as one of the group came with its own fun dose of Imposter Syndrome.
It took some adjusting, but after plenty of late nights, deep talks, and mental breakdowns with the counselors, I came to see them as just people, and managed to shake the rose-colored glasses that I had naively worn as a kid. Starting June 1st of this year, I’ll be a true CIT, and I hope my campers will see me not as perfect, but still as someone who they can look up to and aspire to be like.